Love is a wonderful thing. When we first fall in love, we spend all our time with the person. are in constant contact, and all those lovely things and it's wonderful! But sometimes those behaviors can turn into an unhealthy, codependent relationship. This can be very hard to identify because it can be easily mistaken for some type of intense love. Some people will say, "Oh he's just clingy" or "She just likes to make sure I'm safe, that why she texts me every 10 minutes". When codependency starts, at first we may find it even cute or see it as a sign of affection. But this can sometimes it can be a lot more than that.
Clues you might be in a codependent relationship:
- You have minimal interests outside your relationship
- You see unhealthy traits in your partner but stay anyway because you feel you "need" them or they "need" you
- You are constantly trying to make your partner happy at the cost of your personal emotional, mental and/or physical health
- You feel like you can't live with the other person
- You feel like your babysitting your partner
Having been in a relationship of where the codependency ran rapid between the both of us, after I got out of it, I personally grew hate when people talk about relationships and say "we are one". No your not. You are two people who happen to really care about each other and often have things in common. You may like the same music, from a similar background, enjoy the same sports teams, but you are still two different people and you always will be. Now if you find yourself if this kind of relationship, it's up to you whether you want to continue it or not, but it is healthy for you and your partner to be able to recognize is their is a problem so you can figure out how to go about fixing it. Remember, the most important thing is that you realize how important you and your happiness are.
Use your tarot cards and try out this spread (I didn't include a picture because you can put these cards in any shape you want):
1. What do I bring to this relationship?
2. What does my partner bring to this relationship?
3. What hidden feeling do I have about this relationship?
4. What hidden feelings does my partner have about the relationship?
5. What can we do to improve our relationship?
Using this spread, you can look at the relationship from a different angle to see if their is any issues you might want to address. Codependent relationships usually have something to do with things that happened to the individuals in the relationship, and communication can be the cure for that. So speak up and stand up for your independence because you are beautiful and important and you deserve it.
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